{"id":296,"date":"2008-02-27T10:16:23","date_gmt":"2008-02-27T15:16:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/2parse.com\/?p=296"},"modified":"2008-02-26T23:22:35","modified_gmt":"2008-02-27T04:22:35","slug":"the-funniest-analogies-collected-by-hs-english-teachers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/?p=296","title":{"rendered":"The Funniest Analogies (Collected by H.S. English teachers)"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote><p>From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you\u2019re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote><p>He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote><p>Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<blockquote><p>Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/writingenglish.wordpress.com\/2006\/09\/12\/the-25-funniest-analogies-collected-by-high-school-english-teachers\/trackback\/\">More here<\/a>&#8230;<!--more--><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you\u2019re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River. Shots rang out, as shots [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,46],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-296","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","category-prose"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8qcx-4M","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/296","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=296"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/296\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=296"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=296"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/2parse.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=296"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}